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I'm ready for more jokes.
- Thread starter oldhway
- Start date
bigjohnsd
'21 R1250 GS Adv
An old lady went to her bank, handed her bank card to the teller, and said "I would like to withdraw $10".
The teller replied: "For withdrawals under $100, please use the ATM". The old lady wanted to know why... The teller gave her back her bank card and said in an irritated tone: "These are the rules, please leave if you have nothing more to do. There is a line of customers waiting behind you".
The old lady remained silent for a few seconds, gave the teller her card back, and said "I would like to withdraw all the money in my account".
She then checked the old lady's account balance. She nodded, leaned over, and said respectfully "You have $300,000 in your account but the bank does not have that much liquidity at the moment. Could you make an appointment and come back tomorrow?"
The old lady then asked how much she could withdraw immediately. The teller said she could withdraw any amount up to $3,000.
"Well, I would like to withdraw $3,000 please".
The teller kindly handed her $3,000, with a friendly smile. The old lady put $10 in her purse and asked the teller to deposit $2,990 into her account.
Never underestimate old people, they have spent a lifetime learning.
The teller replied: "For withdrawals under $100, please use the ATM". The old lady wanted to know why... The teller gave her back her bank card and said in an irritated tone: "These are the rules, please leave if you have nothing more to do. There is a line of customers waiting behind you".
The old lady remained silent for a few seconds, gave the teller her card back, and said "I would like to withdraw all the money in my account".
She then checked the old lady's account balance. She nodded, leaned over, and said respectfully "You have $300,000 in your account but the bank does not have that much liquidity at the moment. Could you make an appointment and come back tomorrow?"
The old lady then asked how much she could withdraw immediately. The teller said she could withdraw any amount up to $3,000.
"Well, I would like to withdraw $3,000 please".
The teller kindly handed her $3,000, with a friendly smile. The old lady put $10 in her purse and asked the teller to deposit $2,990 into her account.
Never underestimate old people, they have spent a lifetime learning.
bigjohnsd
'21 R1250 GS Adv
A Scotsman goes to the dentist and asks how much it is for an extraction. "$85 for an extraction sir" was the dentists reply. "Och huv ye nay got unythin cheaper", replies the Scotsman getting agitated. "But that's the normal charge for an extraction sir", said the dentist. "What aboot if ye didnae use uny anaesthetic?", asked the Scotsman hopefully, "Well it's highly unusual sir, but if that's what you want, I suppose I can do it for $70", said the dentist.
"Hmmmm, what aboot if ye used one of ye dentist trainees and still wi' oot anaesthetic", said the Scotsman, "Well it's possible but they are only training and I can't guarantee their level of professionalism and it'll be a lot more painful, but I suppose in that case we can bring the price down to say $40", said the dentist,
"Och that's still a bit much, how aboot if ye make it a training session and have yon student do the extraction and the other students watchin and learnin", said the Scotsman hopefully. "Hmmmmm, well OK it'll be good for the students I suppose, I'll charge you only $5 in that case", said the dentist.
"Wonderful, it's a deal" said the Scotsman..."Can ye book the wife in for next Tuesday"
"Hmmmm, what aboot if ye used one of ye dentist trainees and still wi' oot anaesthetic", said the Scotsman, "Well it's possible but they are only training and I can't guarantee their level of professionalism and it'll be a lot more painful, but I suppose in that case we can bring the price down to say $40", said the dentist,
"Och that's still a bit much, how aboot if ye make it a training session and have yon student do the extraction and the other students watchin and learnin", said the Scotsman hopefully. "Hmmmmm, well OK it'll be good for the students I suppose, I'll charge you only $5 in that case", said the dentist.
"Wonderful, it's a deal" said the Scotsman..."Can ye book the wife in for next Tuesday"
fmdualexhaust
Active member
My BIL could be walking at a fast pace through a field, stop suddenly, back up 2 steps and pick up a 4 leaf clover.
He said they just stood out.
Never seen anyone else do that.
He said they just stood out.
Never seen anyone else do that.
riderr1150gsadv
Well-known member
Thought this was funny..
Local radio station- WHJY Providence runs “stump the DJ” on Thursdays.
Only a couple I can repeat here on the forum-
“How is Christmas like your job”? “You work your A$$ off all year a some fat guy in a suit takes all the credit”.
“I bought my father a Ouiga Board for Christmas so I could communicate with him after my mother sees the vacuum cleaner he got her for Christmas”.
OM
Only a couple I can repeat here on the forum-
“How is Christmas like your job”? “You work your A$$ off all year a some fat guy in a suit takes all the credit”.
“I bought my father a Ouiga Board for Christmas so I could communicate with him after my mother sees the vacuum cleaner he got her for Christmas”.
OM
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