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how to steal a bike

A

adamceckhardt

Guest
So I've got the itch for a sport bike. When I get an itch for something that I can't justify or afford, I usually go big. Why daydream about a Corolla when you can have a Cayman?

This time I'm thinking Italian... good looking, fast, unreliable... the whole nine yards. This has been in the back of my head since our journey across Canada on our GSs this past fall. I tinker around on the internet and look for unique sport bikes that I can't justify or afford, and in short time I settle on an Aprilia RSV1000R. Perfect.

Some time passes and we take a 20 minute trip to Windsor Vermont to have dinner with some friends. I nearly drove off the road when we passed an Aprilia dealership on the way. Really?!? Right here in the middle of nowhere New England there is an Aprilia dealership? If they weren't closed at the time, I would have discovered how to steal a bike right then and there, but I'd have to return during normal business hours. I can't justify or afford a new Aprilia RSV1000R so I'd have to steal one.

Last Friday (my day off) I ventured back to Windsor to drool over machines that I can't justify or afford. When I pulled up to the front of the dealership I saw it sitting directly in front of me- nothing but glass between me and my new crush. What are the odds? An Aprilia dealership in New England AND an RSV1000R in stock... Wow. I walk inside and things are quiet. I do a few laps around the bike and find a sale tag on it. Brand new, "0 miles" marked down from $13,995 to $12,460. I looked up to discover that I was the only person in the place- not the only customer, but the only person at all. I walked around for a bit hoping that someone would come out to talk me into doing something that would land me in the dog house and result in my sleeping on the couch for the next few months. Nothing. Nobody. I notice that the keys are IN the bike. Yes, keys plural, as in both keys that come from the factory are right there. I could have wheeled that sucker right out the door and ridden away undetected, but instead just went home in the 4-wheeled contraption that I showed up in.

So there you have it. If you want to steal a bike, go to the Aprilia dealership in Windsor, VT. I was in there for about 15 minutes all by myself- maybe you'll have a similar experience. My guess is that you could be out the door and on the highway in under 2 minutes. Best of luck!
 
Great story...who's minding the store???:bolt

We stopped and looked at Aprilia's last week...dealership in little college town SE of us that used to only sell Vespas... Saw the 750 Shiver on Trippin on Two Wheels TV show and were curious..that RSV is mighty nice I must agree!!!! Has speeding ticket all over it...just sitting still.

Anyways...we couldn't test ride any as the batteries are all removed????????????for the showroom. The 20 something sales"dude" said call ahead and they will prep one this week. No keys in site here.
 
Our local Harley dealer is the same way, good luck making a quiet getaway though! They have no problem offering test rides, I've been tempted to wring out one of the new Rotax-powered Buells, but have that same problem with my consience; I'm not quite a serious shopper yet.
 
I thought the new RSV1000R bikes all had than new GPS tracking system - Italian version of On Star. I think I read that on the internet somewhere, so .....
 
I thought the new RSV1000R bikes all had than new GPS tracking system - Italian version of On Star. I think I read that on the internet somewhere, so .....

If you're sure about the GPS system being Italian, I wouldn't worry about it functioning properly for long without an expensive and frequent tune up schedule. ;)
 
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