dwestly
New member
So, I'm in the car with the girlfriend (who is the owner of a not-too-clever vanity plate)
when a car goes by with a clever vanity plate. Says I: "look at that vanity plate, isn't that clever". Says she: "Vanity Plate! So you're telling me that I'm vain? How dare you tell me that I'm vain. Wah Wah Wah. Boo Hoo Hoo."
She actually started crying and sobbing that I should be so insensitive.
I should have pulled over and made her walk.
I would suggest the proper course of action in this instance is the immediate re-evaluation of a relationship that is (a) apparently based on Party A being taken advantage of by Party B, and (b) wherein Party B affects this advantage by emotional displays, (c) thereby playing on the sympathies and hormonal drives exhibited by all such Parties A known to mankind.
Given the subsequent evaluation of said relationship, and a subsequent determination that Party B is in fact guilty of the suspected behavior, then application of one of the following remedies is recommended:
1. Party A should immediately render Party B mute through judicious use of the immovable force (Duct Tape), whenever muffling is required. Advantages: Inexpensive. Easily Portable. Quick Applying. Disadvantages: Party B may resist. Solution: Employ help.
2. Party A should consider permanent removal of Party B from Party A's immediate surroundings. Advantages: Don't have to carry Duct Tape anymore. Disadvantages: Party B may throw things. Solution: Duct Tape Party B's arms to prevent aerial projectiles while permanent dissolution announcement is being made.
3. Party A, as a last resort, can hire outside assistance to permanently dissuade Party B from ever reassuming a position in proximity to Party A. Advantages: Someone else does the dirty work. Disadvantages: Party B may struggle. Solution: Duct Tape.
By simply applying logic and a problem/solution process, we now see that Duct Tape seems to be the single, most obvious solution. In other words, if it moves and it shouldn't...Duct Tape.