I'm ready for more jokes.

[PGlaves]

[ExGMan]

Three brothers age 92, 94 and 96 live in a
house together. One night the 96 year old draws a bath, puts his
foot in and pauses. He yells down the stairs,
"Was I getting in or out of the bath?" The 94 year old yells back, "I don't know, I'll come up and see." He starts up the stairs and pauses, then he yells, "Was I going up the stairs or
coming down?" The 92 year old was sitting at the kitchen table having coffee listening to his brothers. He shakes his head and says, "I sure hope I never get that forgetful." He knocks on wood for good luck. He then yells, "I’ll come up and help both of you as
soon as I see who's at the door."

[Pauls1150]

Ziggy -
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[gsinnc]

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[GSAddict]

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[GSAddict]

Ziggy -
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Pi Calculation.jpg

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[GlobalRider]

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Group foto of all men that understand women.

[GlobalRider]

I don't know what I posted here in the past, but I always liked this one...

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[GlobalRider]

Top: What men need to shower.

Bottom: What women need to shower.

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[GlobalRider]

So it reminds me of the couple that wanted a pet so they went to the pet shop and as soon as they walk in they see a parrot in his cage.

The parrot says “hey guys why not consider me for a pet?”. The couple looks at each other and says “well I don’t know, dint want to spend that much for a pet,” “no problem” says the parrot, I’m sure you can talk the owner down in price.”

So they talked to the owner and sure enough the owner agreed on a more reasonable sale price, “but” he said, “you should know that the parrot has a problem “. “A problem?” says the husband, “what problem?”

“Well” the owner said “the parrot has no claws”, “no claws, how does he stay on his perch?”

“Oh that’s not a problem “says the owner, “the parrot has an extra-long penis that he wraps around the perch to compensate”.

So the couple decided to take the parrot home and very quickly got in a routine where everyday the husband came home from work and he would ask the parrot what’s new and the parrot was eager to explain the events of the day.

One day, as usual the husband comes home and asks the parrot what’s new, the parrot says “gee, not sure how to tell you this but I think your wife is fooling around”.

“What do you mean fooling around’ the husband snaps back.

“Well” says the parrot “this morning the delivery man came in and she took her blouse off then he pulled his pants down”.

“Yeah, what happened then” asks the husband?

“I don’t know” says the parrot, “I got a hard on and fell off the perch”.

[ksdcr]

A trucker came into a Truck Stop Cafe' and placed his order. He said I want three flat tires, a pair of headlights and a pair of running boards.' The brand new waitress, not wanting to appear stupid, went to the kitchen and said to the cook,
'This guy out there just ordered three flat tires, a pair of headlights and a pair of running boards..... What does he think this place is an auto parts store?'
'No,' the cook said. 'Three flat tires mean three pancakes; a pair of headlights is two eggs sunny side up; and a pair of running boards... Are 2 slices of crisp bacon!
'Oh... OK!' said the blonde. She thought about it for a moment and then spooned up a bowl of beans and gave it to the customer.
The trucker asked, 'What are the beans for, Blondie?'
'She replied, 'I thought while you were waiting for the flat tires, headlights and running boards, you might as well gas up!
__________________

[20774]

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[henzilla]

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