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Thread: I'm ready for more jokes.

  1. #1141
    Registered User gsinnc's Avatar
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    Lubricant

    Murphy's' old lady had been pregnant for some time and now the time had come.
    He brought her to the doctor and the doctor began to deliver the baby.
    She had a little boy, and the doctor looked over at Murphy and said. 'Hey, Murph! You just had you a son,!

    'Ain't dat grand, !!' Murphy got excited by this, but just then the doctor spoke up and said, 'Hold on! We ain't finished yet, !'

    The doctor then delivered a little girl.
    He said, 'Hey, Murph! You got you a daughter, !!!! She is a pretty lil ting, too....'

    Murphy got kind of puzzled by this and then the doctor said, 'Hold on, we aint got done yet, !'
    The doctor then delivered another boy and said, 'Murph, you just had yourself another boy, !'

    Murphy said to the doctor, 'Doc, what caused all of dem babies,?'
    The doctor said, 'You never know Murph, it was probably something that happened during conception.'
    Murphy said, 'Ah yeah, during conception.'

    When Murph and his wife went home with their three children, he sat down with his wife and said, 'Mama, you remember dat night that we ran out of Vaseline and we had to use dat dere 3-in-1 Oil.'
    She said, 'Yeah, I remember dat night...'

    Murph said, 'I'll tell you, .....it's a damn good ting we didn't use WD-40.
    Ed Apelian
    Motorcycling is my passion because golf is far too dangerous!
    2018 R1200GS - Light White !
    2016 R1200RT- Platinum Bronze

  2. #1142
    Dances With Sheep GREGFEELER's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by gsinnc View Post
    I am sure there is one out there. This thing has just gone wild. But kudos to Bernie ... like him or not .... he's taking it well and they are selling t-shirts and sweatshirts with all proceeds going to charity.
    He's sharp and has turned this whole mime thing into a fund raiser for Meals On Wheels by selling sweatshirts with that image for $45 each:

    https://www.thenonprofittimes.com/ne...eid=628b3b1065
    Greg Feeler
    Ambassador & amateur K-Bike collector, it seems
    1972 R75/5, 1990 K75, 1990 K1, 1992 K75S, 2003 K1200RS

  3. #1143
    Pepperfool GSAddict's Avatar
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    Maybe not THAT sharp....
    Attached Images Attached Images
    '
    Ufda happens..........

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  4. #1144
    Dances With Sheep GREGFEELER's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by GSAddict View Post
    Maybe not THAT sharp....
    Hehe!
    Greg Feeler
    Ambassador & amateur K-Bike collector, it seems
    1972 R75/5, 1990 K75, 1990 K1, 1992 K75S, 2003 K1200RS

  5. #1145
    Liaison 20774's Avatar
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    Don't you know it!

    FiveOClock.jpg
    Kurt -- Forum Liaison ---> Resources and Links Thread <---
    '78 R100/7 & '69 R69S & '52 R25/2
    mine-ineye-deatheah-pielayah-jooa-kalayus. oolah-minane-hay-meeriah-kal-oyus-algay-a-thaykin', buddy!

  6. #1146
    MOA #24991 Pauls1150's Avatar
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    Rare Barn Find

    Anyone know the year?

    BarnFind.jpg

  7. #1147
    Back in the saddle again mikegalbicka's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Pauls1150 View Post
    Anyone know the year?
    Stone Age.

  8. #1148
    MOA #24991 Pauls1150's Avatar
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    We were just digging in the back yard for a project, and got down to bedrock...

  9. #1149
    Pepperfool GSAddict's Avatar
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    Yabba Dabba Doo model.
    '
    Ufda happens..........

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  10. #1150
    Registered User GTRider's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by GSAddict View Post
    Yabba Dabba Doo model.
    I think the owner left the radio on...

    DGerber
    1983 R80ST 1984 R80 G/S-PD 2004 K1200GT w/Hannigan S/C 2010 K1300GT 2018 R1200GS
    BMWMOA#52184, AMA#271542, IBA#138

  11. #1151
    Liaison 20774's Avatar
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    Be sure to check all sources of possible noise when you're troubleshoot!

    Kurt -- Forum Liaison ---> Resources and Links Thread <---
    '78 R100/7 & '69 R69S & '52 R25/2
    mine-ineye-deatheah-pielayah-jooa-kalayus. oolah-minane-hay-meeriah-kal-oyus-algay-a-thaykin', buddy!

  12. #1152
    Mehrten
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    Simple Truths!

    Here are three things that cannot be easily hidden: The Sun, the Moon, and the Truth.

    The following are 2 Simple Truths, 5 Rules of Life, and 3 Bonus Rules:

    SIMPLE TRUTH 1 :

    Lovers help each other undress before sex.
    However, after sex, they always dress on their own .
    Moral of the story -- In life, no one helps you once you're screwed.

    SIMPLE TRUTH 2:

    When a woman is pregnant, all her friends touch her stomach and say, "Congratulations."
    But none go up to the man, touch his penis and say, "Good Job."
    Moral of the story -- Hard work is rarely appreciated.

    FIVE RULES TO REMEMBER IN LIFE:

    1. Money can't buy happiness - but it's far more comfortable to cry in a Porsche than on a bicycle.

    2. Forgive your enemy - but remember the *******'s name.

    3. If you help someone when they're in trouble - they will remember you when they're in trouble again.

    4. Alcohol does not solve any problems - but then, neither does milk.

    5. Many people are alive only because it's illegal to shoot them.

    BONUS RULES:

    1. Condoms do not guarantee safe sex! A friend of mine was wearing one when he was shot by the woman's husband.

    2. I think all politicians should wear uniforms. You know, like NASCAR drivers, so we could identify their corporate sponsors.

    3. Also, all politicians should serve only two terms -- one in office and one in prison.

  13. #1153
    Pepperfool GSAddict's Avatar
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    ^^^^^I'm takin' those to the Bank!^^^^
    '
    Ufda happens..........

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