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Thread: I'm ready for more jokes.

  1. #751
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    I am thinking you will see this again!Image-1.jpg

  2. #752
    Watch This!!! junkjohn's Avatar
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    A man leaves home on foot one evening, makes three left turns and arrives back home to find two masked men waiting there.
    Who are they?
    John Simonds
    2017 R 1200 GS Adventure
    1975 Norton Commando 850 Roadster Mk 3
    If it ain't broke, fix it 'till it is.

  3. #753
    Registered User GTRider's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by junkjohn View Post
    A man leaves home on foot one evening, makes three left turns and arrives back home to find two masked men waiting there.
    Who are they?
    Nurses at his nursing home?

    GTRider
    DGerber
    1983 R80ST — 1984 R80 G/S PD — 1993 R100GS — 2004 K1200GT w/Hannigan S/C — 2010 K1300GT
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  4. #754
    Registered User WalterK75's Avatar
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    All the good knights were leaving for the Crusades.

    One knight called his best friend over to his quarters and said, “My bride is without doubt one of the most beautiful women in the world. It would be a terrible waste if no man could have her. Therefore, as my best and most trusted friend, I am leaving you the key to her chastity belt to use should I not return from the Crusade in five years.”

    The company of knights were only a mile or so out of town when they noticed a cloud of dust approaching.

    Thinking it might be an important message from the town the column halted. A horseman approached. It was the knight’s best friend. When he caught his breath, he exclaimed, “You gave me the wrong key!!”
    Walter

    Every decent man is ashamed of the government he lives under.
    H. L. Mencken

  5. #755
    Watch This!!! junkjohn's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by GTRider View Post
    Nurses at his nursing home?

    GTRider
    The catcher and the Umpire.
    John Simonds
    2017 R 1200 GS Adventure
    1975 Norton Commando 850 Roadster Mk 3
    If it ain't broke, fix it 'till it is.

  6. #756
    Registered User GTRider's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by junkjohn View Post
    The catcher and the Umpire.


    Paying my dues for not being much of a team sports fan, I guess.

    DG
    DGerber
    1983 R80ST — 1984 R80 G/S PD — 1993 R100GS — 2004 K1200GT w/Hannigan S/C — 2010 K1300GT
    BMWMOA#52184, AMA#271542, IBA#138

  7. #757
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    A mother was teaching her young daughter how to roast a turkey for Thanksgiving Dinner. She finished by saying “ and you cut this part off before putting it in the pan”. To which the young daughter asked “why do you cut that part off ?”. The mother replied that she didn’t know why, but that’s the way she was taught. She thought for a moment and said “we need to ask my Mother”.

    They asked the young girls Grandmother and she said she didn’t know why either, but that’s the way she learned to do it too.

    Then the Grandmother said “we will ask my Mother when she gets here”. So when the young girls Great Grandmother arrived they all asked her why she cut that piece of the turkey off before putting it in the pan.

    She replied “ It wouldn’t fit in the pan “.

  8. #758
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    A man saw a little boy who had fixed up his wagon like a fire truck and his dog was pulling it.

    The man said “You could probably go a lot faster if you didn’t have that string tied to your dogs testicles”.

    To which the little boy replied “That’s true but then I wouldn’t have a siren”.


    Charlie

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