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Thread: NASCAR Virgin

  1. #1

    NASCAR Virgin

    Having mastered baseball, I now have VIP tickets to NASCAR's only Pac NW visit.

    What do I need to know?

    Folks enlighten me!

  2. #2
    535IS
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    This is gonna be a great thread ...

  3. #3
    Rally Rat
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    Wear a dirty John Deere cap, and a tank top with barbeque stains on the front and a large #3 painted on the back. Drink large amounts of Pabst Blue Ribbon. Put a Skoal can in your back pocket, and have some between your cheek and gum at all times. Don't speak. (The latter advice is critical!)

  4. #4
    Who is #3?

    Having Skoal between your cheeks at all time...won't that make you walk funny?

    We had a m/c team sponsored by Skoal Bandits back in the 80's I think. Skoal was then banned in the UK for being linked with mouth cancers I believe, so perhaps sticking it up your derriere might make more sense.

  5. #5
    Republic of Texas
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    Quote Originally Posted by lamble View Post
    Who is #3?
    Oh my . . . don't dare ask that while actually AT the race!
    Mike White
    MOA Life Time Member #57882
    '13 K1300S "30 Years", '95 R1100RS, '88 K75S, '97 Ducati 916, '95 Ducati 900SS CR. Gone, but not forgotten, '75 R90S

  6. #6
    Is it Daisy Duke's IQ?

    Yes we had the Dukes of Hazard shown on UK TV. Never understood why they didn't use the doors on the car though, especially with all those fat folk in the programme.

    I tried to find Cleatus in an anatomical journal, but I couldn't!

    It was a documentary wasn't it?

    Who is #3 then???

  7. #7
    Registered User gfspencer's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by lamble View Post
    Who is #3?
    Here you go -

    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dale_Earnhardt
    2015 R nineT

  8. #8
    Republic of Texas
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    Quote Originally Posted by lamble View Post
    Who is #3?
    And, in case you really don't know, it is the late Dale Earnhardt.
    Mike White
    MOA Life Time Member #57882
    '13 K1300S "30 Years", '95 R1100RS, '88 K75S, '97 Ducati 916, '95 Ducati 900SS CR. Gone, but not forgotten, '75 R90S

  9. #9
    Quote Originally Posted by BeemerMike View Post
    And, in case you really don't know, it is the late Dale Earnhardt.
    Never heard of him, late or not. I'll read the wiki.

  10. #10
    So what's the skill factor/s I should be looking for, so I can appreciate the sport.
    I mean I understand there aren't Grand Prix type tracks, but there's more to it, I assume, than going in a circle.

    Nuances, art, tactics...what's good and what's...dukes of hazard?

  11. #11
    535IS
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    Quote Originally Posted by lamble View Post
    Who is #3?
    Ever seen a guy wearing an Ayrton Senna shirt? This is the same thing, only redneck style. It's the late Dale Earnhardt's number and is considered sacred by many NASCAR fans. If you can imagine Michael Schumacher getting killed in his last race, you'll understand the situation.
    Having Skoal between your cheeks at all time...won't that make you walk funny?

    We had a m/c team sponsored by Skoal Bandits back in the 80's I think. Skoal was then banned in the UK for being linked with mouth cancers I believe, so perhaps sticking it up your derriere might make more sense.
    Yeah; the cancer risk is there, even if you shove it up yer butt (which brings entirely new meaning to the brand name "Bandit"). You can fake this convincingly if you simply chew black licorice and spit constantly, leaving some dribbling down your chin. If you have all your teeth, it might help to let some of the licorice stick to them ... oh, wait; you're English. Of course you don't have all your teeth.

    DO NOT under ANY circumstances wear Earth Shoes? or clogs. Boots or sneakers are the only acceptable footwear. More later ...

  12. #12
    535IS
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    Quote Originally Posted by lamble View Post
    I mean I understand there aren't Grand Prix type tracks, but there's more to it, I assume, than going in a circle.
    Yes, there are, and no, there isn't.

  13. #13
    Registered User lkchris's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by hlothery View Post
    Wear a dirty John Deere cap, and a tank top with barbeque stains on the front and a large #3 painted on the back. Drink large amounts of Pabst Blue Ribbon. Put a Skoal can in your back pocket, and have some between your cheek and gum at all times. Don't speak. (The latter advice is critical!)
    Guess this is a thread where the same thing as racism is just OK.

    Facts--as usual--don't support your prejudices.

    But, I suppose if you need to put others down to make yourself seem worthy ... .
    Kent Christensen
    21482
    '12 R1200RT, '02 R1100S

  14. #14
    In Britain we call them Billy Bob teeth, wonder where that comes from?

  15. #15
    Quote Originally Posted by lkchris View Post
    Guess this is a thread where the same thing as racism is just OK.

    Facts--as usual--don't support your prejudices.

    But, I suppose if you need to put others down to make yourself seem worthy ... .

    Been to Albuquerque...nice there, especially the old town part. Good Triumph dealer too on the outskirts. It's where my wife flew in to meet me, when I was riding across the USA on back roads. I can still remember the joy of clean underwear arriving. Many fond memories.

    Only problem is, my perspective colours my opinion of the place. I'm sure there's some of it that's less hospitable than where I was...I was just stereotyping based on my personal experiences...sometimes it's hard not to show a bias. Traits and trends are what we are classed by, be it colour, religion, economic value, age, sexuality, ability to ride or not, brand choice etc...

    So that's sorted, back to nascar.
    There's a guy called Little racing...anything anyone knows about him...Chad, I've just been texted.

    Chad Little will be racing, says the text. Wow, I suppose!

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