Least Mileage Contest

Well it all started with this new toaster and a crumpet that normally on #4 would have been just right, but not this extra crispy version. Carelessly tossing it from the window, my misfortune was that I encountered it later, in a location where a squirrel gang had dragged it, etc...

minus 2000 miles please!

0 miles ridden in May, $4000 spent at the shop in May

Maybe my bike will get out of the shop this month, in which case I'll surely loose - again - but in the meantime I'm tied for first and I'm hemorrhaging plenty of cash getting my clutch spline and clutch hub replaced, adding the Hyperpro rear shock, JL Oilite paralever bushing, etc. etc.

If I can keep this trend up I'll surely win the most money spent per mile ridden sub-category!

On the other hand, it's amazing how long that tank of gas I bought way back in mid-April has lasted...

Hmph.


Well, the pair of baby GS's have not been started yet this month. They sit, side by side, in the garage.

The R45 and the R80 have not been uncovered since October. In fact, the R80 has not been ridden since it was brought home in July of 07. (I'm not prepared to ride a sidecar rig just yet......)

HA!!! I may win yet!!!!

lamble said:

Well it all started with this new toaster and a crumpet that normally on #4 would have been just right, but not this extra crispy version. Carelessly tossing it from the window, my misfortune was that I encountered it later, in a location where a squirrel gang had dragged it, etc...

minus 2000 miles please!

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Wait a minute, I don't even understand what language you are using. Crumpet? Perhaps if you "dumbed down" and use American English you might have a chance.

However, some bonus points for the attempt.

OfficerImpersonator said:

Maybe my bike will get out of the shop this month, in which case I'll surely loose - again - but in the meantime I'm tied for first and I'm hemorrhaging plenty of cash getting my clutch spline and clutch hub replaced, adding the Hyperpro rear shock, JL Oilite paralever bushing, etc. etc.

If I can keep this trend up I'll surely win the most money spent per mile ridden sub-category!

On the other hand, it's amazing how long that tank of gas I bought way back in mid-April has lasted...

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OUCH

Well, you are leading in the sympathy category, that is for sure. And perhaps the highest cost per mile! But with the least MPG I'm not sure how it will all balance out.

Please continue to keep us updated as to your progress.

flymymbz said:

Hmph.


Well, the pair of baby GS's have not been started yet this month. They sit, side by side, in the garage.

The R45 and the R80 have not been uncovered since October. In fact, the R80 has not been ridden since it was brought home in July of 07. (I'm not prepared to ride a sidecar rig just yet......)

HA!!! I may win yet!!!!

Click to expand...

So 4 BMW's in the stable and no riding this month? Hmmmmm........ Almost sounds like you are trying to win. But there are a lot of good days left this month to ride and you may not be able to contain yourself.

I will watch your progress with guarded optimism.

SIBUD said:

Wait a minute, I don't even understand what language you are using. Crumpet? Perhaps if you "dumbed down" and use American English you might have a chance.

However, some bonus points for the attempt.

Click to expand...

Now Bud, those of us who were part of the "other side" during the Revolutionary War take great exception to your use of the oxymoron
"American English". It may be American, however it's not English.

I have to admit ,that as a matter of honour (Note the correct spelling) my wife who is English, claims that I speak Canadianese as opposed to English.

Obviously, those of us in the colonies, and former colonies, simply don't speak English.

Regards, Rod.

RODSHERIDAN said:

Now Bud, those of us who were part of the "other side" during the Revolutionary War take great exception to your use of the oxymoron
"American English". It may be American, however it's not English.

I have to admit ,that as a matter of honour (Note the correct spelling) my wife who is English, claims that I speak Canadianese as opposed to English.

Obviously, those of us in the colonies, and former colonies, simply don't speak English.

Regards, Rod.

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Yes, I know, (please insert tongue in cheek emoticon here) the "losers" always try to tell the winners how to speak.

What do you call the language spoken by the majority of Americans? If it is not English, then what will we speak in those states that want "English" as the official language? As an example, which English language will we speak? That of Southern Alabama, Northern Minnesota, Boston, Texas or S. Illinois? But I digress.

English dialects are a very touchy subject, even among the British. But, for the purposes of this contest, we will continue to request mileage in miles not KM's (as America continues to try to fight the metric imperialists). And as always, the decision of the Judge is final.

Now as to my friends north of the border, we have nothing but warmest regards and will continue to encourage them to speak any way they wish, even though we often don't have a clue as to what they are saying. I mean, how do you translate Tim Horton's to Americans?

BTW Nurse Nancy and I will again be sailing in the North Channel of Lake Huron this summer where we will renew our friendship with our Canadian friends, some of the most friendly and gracious people we have ever met.

Bud, I laughed, great post.

I think Americanese, and Canadianese would be appropriate, and when we use words, or pronunciations that aren't proper English, we'll have a built in excuse.

I have to admit, I'm at a loss to explain the Tim Horton addiction, and I'm Canadian.

Perhaps it's our plan of revenge for losing the revolutionary war, we'll get you addicted to our coffee, then hold you hostage in the Great Camadian Timmies Embargo.......Rod.

P.S. Please explain to a lowly Canadian, why you would shake off the mantle of colonialism, and keep their measurement system?

RODSHERIDAN said:

Bud, I laughed, great post.

I think Americanese, and Canadianese would be appropriate, and when we use words, or pronunciations that aren't proper English, we'll have a built in excuse.

I have to admit, I'm at a loss to explain the Tim Horton addiction, and I'm Canadian.

Perhaps it's our plan of revenge for losing the revolutionary war, we'll get you addicted to our coffee, then hold you hostage in the Great Camadian Timmies Embargo.......Rod.

P.S. Please explain to a lowly Canadian, why you would shake off the mantle of colonialism, and keep their measurement system?

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Because we aren't the brightest bulb on the bike?

Rolled backwards for 25 feet in the barn yesterday!

535is said:

Rolled backwards for 25 feet in the barn yesterday!

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But did the odometer roll backwards as well? If not, you might as well have not bothered with the effort.

SIBUD said:

Very special prize offered for the least mileage ridden in May, 2008. Post your beginning mileage now and ending mileage no later than June 2, on this thread. In case of a tie, the best reason, in the decision of the judges (me) will determine the winner. Need not be present to win.

Seriously folks, this prize would look good on your wall and will be a constant reminder for years to come.

I will take your word for both beginning and ending mileage (we are all adults after all). The reasons do not have to be completely honest. In fact, embellishment or exaggerations are encouraged.

Decision of the judge is final.

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No miles so far this month and yesterday was a gorgeous day in central VA. I was given three choices for yesterday afternoon.

1) I wanted to go riding.
2) My better-half wanted to do yardwork. ie plant flowers.
3) My young sons wanted to go fishing at the little farm pond down the street.

It was an easy choice.













Fishing won.

userw5 said:

No miles so far this month and yesterday was a gorgeous day in central VA. I was given three choices for yesterday afternoon.

1) I wanted to go riding.
2) My better-half wanted to do yardwork. ie plant flowers.
3) My young sons wanted to go fishing at the little farm pond down the street.

It was an easy choice.

Fishing won.

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Great!!!

I tried the same thing however for me it went as follows...

1) I wanted to go riding.
2) My better-half wanted to do yardwork (i.e. plant sod in my case)
3) My son decided to ditch my efforts to get out of yardwork and played with his friends so...

The wife won!!!! Ugh!


Mileage in May: 0 (KM's or Miles)
Amount of Sod Placed: 1 Front Yard
# of Sons to talk to about helping out the old man!: 1

gabentx said:

Great!!!

I tried the same thing however for me it went as follows...

1) I wanted to go riding.
2) My better-half wanted to do yardwork (i.e. plant sod in my case)
3) My son decided to ditch my efforts to get out of yardwork and played with his friends so...

The wife won!!!! Ugh!


Mileage in May: 0 (KM's or Miles)
Amount of Sod Placed: 1 Front Yard
# of Sons to talk to about helping out the old man!: 1

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By telling now why you are not riding, you are jeopardizing your chance to tell a big enough whopper of a tale to take first place for least miles.

However, you may be getting enough "wife points" to not care. After all, a man has got to do what a man has got to do.

As an aside, have you seen the Domino's pizza commercial that promises delivery in 30 minutes? The husband says to his wife that they had 30 minutes and the wife asks what are we going to do with the other 28.

least miles contest

I still have 0 miles on my BMW R 1200 GS for the month of may, but I now have 55 miles on my Harley Road King.
Question are the miles that we don't put on just for BMW bikes?

afhrnfa1 said:

I still have 0 miles on my BMW R 1200 GS for the month of may, but I now have 55 miles on my Harley Road King.
Question are the miles that we don't put on just for BMW bikes?

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Please stand by as I get a ruling from the Judge.

I don't know why it took me so long to lose this contest, but today, I officially lost it. 164 miles. Whoops.

crazydrummerdude said:

I don't know why it took me so long to lose this contest, but today, I officially lost it. 164 miles. Whoops.

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Dude,

I'm shocked. After being in the running for so many days you then just blow it all off for a few miles of pleasure. What were you thinking? Did you forget the MAJOR PRIZE?

There is still a chance if you can make up a really good story to overcome those miles.

Don't give up hope just yet.

I was just thinking about a least amount of posts contest...