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embarrassing moments

I was young then.

Twenty-Three, living in Azusa, CA, riding a new Norton 750 Atlas Scrambler, restless; I determined to seek out a young beauty with whom I had suffered through an unfortunate misunderstanding. She had settled in El Paso. Thinking somehow that riding the Norton for a year in So Cal had improved my personality I set about launching a reprise of our relationship ÔÇô or at least settling the matter so I could concentrate on the rest of my life. I left my job, gave my car to my sister, dumped the little junk I had accumulated and packed everything I owned on the back of the bike in an AF flight bag, with enough tools to almost overhaul the Norton in an AWOL bag on top.

I had carefully studied the maps and figured some of the 1965 era gas stops exceeded the approximate 75-mile range of my 2-1/2 gallon tank, so I tied a full 2-gallon jerry can on the back with thin nylon rope. Well, I had good luck; the ÔÇ£last gas for 100 milesÔÇØ sign failed to show up. Highway 10 was under construction much of the way. I idled along, bouncing over dirt roads through Phoenix along with hundreds of motorists. My campout consisted of an old Army blanket and a couple of packs of cigarettes. I spent a night a couple of miles off on a Jeep trail in Apache territory lying under the stars with my helmet and face shield on to ward off the mosquitoes. I had never before seen sky quite like that ÔÇô clear, bright and endless. The next morning I rode the bike to the first caf?® I ran into and had breakfast.

The first thing I did in El Paso was rent a room in an obscure little motel outside of town, and got cleaned up and began my search for my dream girl. She was completely forgiving, very interested in the Norton and suggested we take it up to a nice little mountain retreat in Alamogordo she knew of. She hiked up her skirt and piled on behind me on the bike, squeezing between me and the flight bag and off we went.

About 40 miles out of town the engine sputtered briefly and died. I rolled to a stop on the desolate road, with nothing in view but hot May desert terrain. I should have gassed up in El Paso, but didnÔÇÖt ÔÇô nevertheless with complete confidence and assurance to my young lady that everything was in order, I stepped around to the back of the bundle to untie the gas can only to discover that the tight nylon rope had sawn through the metal can because of the vibration and bouncing, and the fuel had completely evaporated.

Well, thatÔÇÖs the story, but to complete it, I had determined a few years previously in my motorcycling style to never ever leave a bike unattended on the highway, so I began to push the bike to wherever I needed to go. As we came to a rise I could see a village a few miles off and was intent on pushing it there. A family in an RV came along after about a half-hour and filled up the tank for me. We proceeded on our way and had a memorable stay in Alamogordo.
 
lost side case

I was cruising down a nice 4 lane road with a 55mph limit doing what I considered a very reasonable 65-70 when a state trooper pulled up next to me waving. Damn! I couldn't figured out where he came from but I wasn't happy. As I pulled over, he rolled down his window and yelled "Your saddle bag fell off back there!" then roared off. I think I would have been happier if he gave me a ticket!

I doubled back to see my side case sitting in the right hand lane on the opposite side nearly causing accidents as car after car swerved and/or braked to avoid it. Doubled back again, pulled on to the shoulder and dashed out into traffic to retrieve it while all the drivers in their cages looked at me with total disdain. I think I could hear them saying "look at that f#@&ing idiot" to their passengers.

Now the really embarrassing part. This is not the first time I've done this. Am I the only absent minded one out there who will from time to time latch the case closed but forget to push down the handle that actuallly secures the bag to the bike?
 
On my Airhead RS, a Saturday ride, about 65 miles from home I stop for gas. Hang the helmet on the right side mirror while I fuel. Then I start the bike to ride the 50 yards to the front of the station intending to get a drink and take a smoke break. Half way there my helmet jumps off the mirror and as I reach to grab it I realize the throttle lock is still on and I am accelerating toward the building and juggling the helmet with my right hand. I pull the clutch to slow my momentum and the motor screams toward redline, which gets everyones immediate attention. I give up on the helmet and as it bounces off the pavement I grab the brake and (why, I don't know to this day) stab the pavement with my left foot. The Krauser bag hits me in the back of my left calf trapping my boot between it and the ground and down I go on the left side while holding the clutch in with a death grip. Land on my elbow and take up the shock in my wrist. The three Harley riders sitting in front of the station pick up the bike as their girlfriends try not to laugh too loud.

I get my drink and a cigarette and take off my watch because my wrist is swelling badly. Pick a route home which I calculate has the fewest stops and the least need to use the clutch and ride home. Get off the bike, open the garage door and it is all over - I can't pull the clutch in to ride it the last six feet into the garage. Wrist broken, six weeks in a cast.:banghead

John
 
Many moons ago I was just off the Bluenose, from Bar Harbor to Yarmouth, heading up the East coast of Nova Scotia. I stopped for gas and put 'er up on the centerstand. When I was done I clambered on and rolled ahead just enough to drop off of the stand.

Then I started up and slowly moved off... about 20 feet (or about 6.2 meters, Eh?) and she bogged. Even under power I couldn't go any further. The centerstand managed to grab up the bell-dinger air hose which was NAILED down at both ends. :banghead The guys at the station were having a great time watching this American fool get stuck. They let me extricate myself... enjoying the show. :lurk
 
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1980 I had a 1977 R100RS. I was 20, yep started BMW's young. I was at Metro Center Mall here in Phoenix, full face on leaving a parking spot when I spy a cutie checking out the bike. I cruise on over and while she walks, I ride along side chatting, faceshield up, feet on the pegs, real slow. Being James Dean cool, ya know.
We come to a speed bump I don't see and don't have the speed to ride over it.
Fast stop...fall over...feet still on the pegs...she laughs walks off, I pickup the bike and ride off.

Rog
 
Does it seem to everyone else that a lot of our most embarassing moments happened in Az? Maybe they should put "Arizona: The Land of Embarassment" on their license plates.
 
I went to a benifit ride around 4 years ago with a friend. After the ride they had a dinner and bike games. You know drive over the 2x4s, slow bike race, and so on. We were both driving Honda's. In the slow bike race we were doing good. It was almost to the last few riders. So here we were lined up ready to go. Half way my clutch cable brakes bad timing. I went down high rpm's. Rearend got away from me. My friend goes down looking at me. We were both all right. But all the harley guys were laughing. But it was all good. My friend was more embarrassed then me.
 
1978 - On my new fully dressed GoldWing, I am stopped in a parking lot flirting with this cute girl, after "participating" in a beer softball game. I am strattling the bike talking to her, and decide to dismount to continue the conversation on a more personal level. I get off and lean the bike on the sidestand, except that I forgot to put it down and down goes the bike!

She wasn't impressed and I didn't get the date.
 
Why does everyone seem scared to wipe out in front of the Harley guys?

Including me.

I was at a stop light the other day, Harley guy pulls up next to me.. light turns green, and I try to take off, but I forgot to downshift, and it dies in 5th. He takes off, and doesn't look back.

In 3k of road riding, I guess that's not too bad. Knock on wood.

...

In my field last year, I was tailgating my brother who was on the XT, and I was on the Blaster. He slammed on the brakes, and I wasn't paying attention, and nailed him.

...

2 months ago, I took a ride on my friends mint condition $5500 Banshee, through some water; hydroplaned over it, and flew off sideways over the handlebars, landing on my head. He was right behind me, watching.

...

Last year, a friend was trying out dirtbikes for the first time. He dumped the clutch, did a wheelie, spun it around as if he was dancing with it, and both of them fell over into the bushes.. in front of everyone.

...

Last weekend, a friend was trying out our "automatic" 4wheeler, and slammed right into my brothers jeep, and flew over the handlebars.

...

Last weekend, on the first lap of the first ride of the weekend, a friend hits a tiny dip on his 3wheeler, and wipes out.. breaking his collar bone.
 
Obsessed with securing my 1973 CB 350 Four, in 1992, I used a Kryptonite U-shape bicycle lock on the rear wheel, forget about it, and drive two feet, jamming it into the fender-well, well.

The next week, eschewing the Kryptonite now, being a smart-guy in stages, I conclude that Honda had it right and lock the steering wheel.
The next hour, I gun the engine off the curb, all hip-slick-and-cool in front of the girl I'm trying to be impress, and face plant the pavement while the locked bike slides down the street.
 
oh

i crashed my bike last weekend in my friend's front lawn thinking i was in first as i drove up the hill onto the grass, but i was in second and spun the rear wheel. i have a bruise the size of a small plate on my right calf from where the peg smashed me after i laid the bike down on the left. luckily it was only in front of 4 people:laugh
 
It was about 27 years ago, I ran into the back of my brothers R69S as we were riding up to the Dells Rally, on my R50.
He went to pass a truck, didn't think he could make it and braked hard. I thought he was going for it and I was right behind him. He braked and I hit him once as I was trying to get my brand new boots to the rear brake, and then he braked again, and I hit him again. My front wheel chewed a hole in his sidebag, which he turned around (Wixom, I think) and his tent pole broke my headlight lens. I was shaken and we stopped for a while to sort things out. I was still upset when we took off and almost went off the road in a big left hand sweeper. I told myself to calm down, or something worse would happen. Got harassed all weekend. In fact, my brother brought it up last weekend.
 
Yesterday infront of my examiner

During the 30 minute break in our Instructor training session with live students that we were teaching, someone decided to hone their tight space manouevering skills, emphasising the counterweighting aspect, so as to make it visible from across the range.
Well let me tell you, the angle of lean I achieved momentarily before dumping the bike into a tarmac/indicator light interface, was truly impressive.
The dismount was of chinese gymnast quality too.

Bugger! and bugger again!! with a whole buggeration of buggers thrown in!!!!!

I was glad most of the students had cleared off to find cold drinks and food, leaving only my fellow novice instructors and the chief instructor for the State of Washington as witnesses...how glad was I that they were all watching?
What a pillock!!!.

...and they still passed me. Jeezy Chreezy (Italian for Jesus Christ) there really must be a monumental shortage of instructors.
 
I started this thread so I had better tell of my own momment in time.:type

I was with my wife and some friends, and we had stopped in to have breakfast at the Cracker Barrell.
We were all eating breakfast and talking for a while, and ejoying each others company, when I felt that ol uneasy feelin down in the intestine. "Grumble Grumble" it went, and friends I knew that it was time for me to excuse myself.
Well there I went, sorta at a quick pace!
I walked into the area where the restrooms were located, and quickly looked at the signs on the doors so I would know which door to open. I quickly saw the "Men" door and went in. Now friends, I got in there, and just barely made it before the space shuttle took off. I was so glad no one was in there. It was at that time I heard the door open and I saw high heels underneath the next stall. I started asking God to help me out of this! Yes, Friends, I had gone into the Lady's room. I sat there and waited until no one was in there. I got up and quickly left, but on the way out a lady was on the way in. I nearly died right there, I bet she did too when she finally got in the restroom!
Whew!:laugh God helped me!!!
 
I started this thread so I had better tell of my own momment in time.:type

I was with my wife and some friends, and we had stopped in to have breakfast at the Cracker Barrell.
We were all eating breakfast and talking for a while, and ejoying each others company, when I felt that ol uneasy feelin down in the intestine. "Grumble Grumble" it went, and friends I knew that it was time for me to excuse myself.
Well there I went, sorta at a quick pace!
I walked into the area where the restrooms were located, and quickly looked at the signs on the doors so I would know which door to open. I quickly saw the "Men" door and went in. Now friends, I got in there, and just barely made it before the space shuttle took off. I was so glad no one was in there. It was at that time I heard the door open and I saw high heels underneath the next stall. I started asking God to help me out of this! Yes, Friends, I had gone into the Lady's room. I sat there and waited until no one was in there. I got up and quickly left, but on the way out a lady was on the way in. I nearly died right there, I bet she did too when she finally got in the restroom!
Whew!:laugh God helped me!!!



We have a winner. :jester
 
When I started this thread, I really meant embarasmet on or off the motorbike. So, keep 'em coming this is great!
 
Long ride from Houston to Alcoa, TN (just outside Knoxville) and a couple of days at The Dragon. We stopped on day 3 of the ride in Maryville for gas just before getting to Alcoa. I'm with 2 other friends, they on their 1150RTs and me on my K1200RS. One friend is PO'd at me for a caught-in-a-downpour-late-at-night fiasco north of Hot Springs, AR the night before. At the gas station I step into a puddle of something VERY slippery as I come off the bike and down I and the bike go. The bike has a very soft landing due to my failed struggle to keep it upright and suffers little but a scratch but I can't get it back upright on my own. One friend helps but the other PO'd friend sits on his bike with his armed folded and refuses to help.

Two days later we are lost on a county road near the dragon on the way to the Cherohola Skyway. Trying to get a good read on the map, we stop in a church parking lot on one of the very few remotely level pieces of land in the region. However, remotely level means a pretty decent slope. As we park, my talking-to-me friend slips on some parking lot gravel while dismounting, falls down-slope and into the not-talking-to-me friend on his brand, spanking new 1150RT. He falls over, breaking the lower mirror and scuffing the bodywork on the left side of his bike.

While I wanted to fold my arms and watch, just couldn't do anything but the right thing and help him get the bike back up. FWIW, that night he ditched us just south of Chatanooga and drove back to Houston while we went to the Barber Museum in Birmingham and then traveled the Natchez Trace.

Not really embarrassing but a freaky karma story.
 
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