My wife sat down on the settee next to me as I was flipping channels. She asked,

'What's on TV?'

I said, 'Dust.'

And then the fight started...

My wife and I were watching "Who Wants To Be A Millionaire" while we were in

bed. I turned to her and said, "Do you want to have sex?"

"No," she answered.

I then said, "Is that your final answer?"

She didn't even look at me this time, simply saying, "Yes."

So I said, "Then I'd like to phone a friend."

And then the fight started....